Market:  New York

Athlete:  Samantha Santaniello (Point72 Asset Management)

There’s no doubt that The Decathlon is full of obstacles. Ten of them to be exact, not counting the athletes you’re competing against. When I completed my first run-through of events, I could perform 1 dip, zero pull-ups, and 5 reps on the bench. I constantly wondered, “What have I gotten myself into?” I didn’t want to disappoint friends, family, and colleagues, all who had donated to this cause I am so passionate about. I came to call this theme of worrying the ‘fear of failing’ syndrome.

Sure, as a varsity swimmer, I’ve won a few races before, but conquering The Decathlon represents for me a whole new level of success and I’ve had to change my mindset as a result. To do so, I’ve thought about how I used to prepare for swim meets in college. I came to realize that preparation never involved negative statements or the fear of failure – if I lost a race, I was able to build on that race and use it as an opportunity to improve. Insert ‘mental toughness’ here - where we all have to acknowledge that very challenging moments can occur in sports – but it is all about having the capacity in a quick time frame to turn a negative experience into a positive one.

Training for the Decathlon, like any varsity sport, is relentless; my body has been broken down, my hands have been blistered and bloody, and the clock certainly had no mercy. But, I remembered that performance in any single race is undergirded by consistent performance in practices and I’ve only learned lessons of resilience and grit lap after lap after lap in practice. The Decathlon is no different. Each training session was an opportunity to challenge myself and improve and to overcome the obstacles. With each rep, I found myself rewiring my resolve. Leading up to game day, I made a commitment to affirm positive thoughts, to ignore ‘a fear of failing’, to push past that mental wall before my body hit its physical limits.

Fast Forward: Game Day – 2015 – talk about pre-race jitters. It was 90 degrees and the sun was glaring. I was warming up with the crowd, already sweating, already thinking ‘so much for mental toughness.’ After tossing some choice words around, I realized this uncertainty was nothing new. I had to focus my mind on the positive of completing the event, channel the natural aggressiveness, and trust my training plan that already got me this far. I remembered performing the dips, the pull-ups, the bench, and being genuinely excited to even have the experience. Though my lungs were burning, my legs and arms were tired, and I definitely had doubts in my ability I focused on relaxing my mind with my go-to mantras– “I’m strong” “I’m kicking butt” “I’m killing it”. As dorky as it may have been, I found that I was saying them out loud. The more physical you make it, the better – you’re not only saying your mantra but you’re hearing it too, which makes a difference. My body and mind are stronger than I think sometimes.

22 dips. 5 pull-ups. 28 reps on the bench. My arms felt like they were about to fall off, my legs were tight, I was tired and hungry, but I was proud of myself. I realized that, ultimately, success is more about believing in your end goal than believing in the obstacles; which is a unique but powerful mindset that got me through.

After the Decathlon was over, I was able to finally absorb all of the special moments on event day. I looked around and I found that being surrounded by like-minded, positive, and supportive fans and competitors had given me a mental kick that translated into a physical kick; saying thank you to my mom and my friends as they cheered on the sidelines or giving a competitor a high five – I could actually feel tangible energy connecting from those people to me. Even more, I was able to discover my own potential inside the actions of my competitors. What’s more inspiring than knowing they also got themselves out of bed, put their bodies into action, and dedicated hundreds of hours of training on top of a Wall Street Schedule? Nothing!

The Decathlon isn’t just about achieving your personal goals, it’s about each moment you share with other athletes – challenging and encouraging one another to train hard and raise more to benefit the greater purpose: funding for cancer research. It’s the collective effort – on the part of MSKCC, the donors, the sponsors, the competitors, the organizers – that has proved most inspiring providing me with an unrivaled opportunity to do it all again, but do it better.. So, here I am, back for round two, back for all of my loved one’s who have passed, back to push others and myself further beyond what we thought were our limits.

I’m back to bring it.
Samantha